dream.....dream....dream.....

I hate it i hontoni hate it, i mean whats the problem, i know my dream its a Little bit crazy but i thought all the possible alternative’s to make it true and then it like its impossible it not like that dream is something that I what just cause I want it I mean y something I really what to do , and is something that I can only do in this time of my life , and they just took it away, so what so I suppose to do, I don’t feel angry, I’m not angry with them, I’m not angry with life, but I hate the fact that no matter what you do and try to get something and you just can, no just for people , life situation which put on prove your relationships with the important people of your life, and you have to choose, there’s no double option , no matter what you have to choose between thing really important to you, and it’s just a holy crap, cause the only thing you can is left the dream of your life go away disappears and there’s nothing to fix that shit, because it’s not something you just want, it’s the thing you want to do no matter what, your wish your hope, and it’s not like I can do that whenever I want cause I have a limited time and once that time pass, it won’t be a way to fix it, I won’t be a way to get it , I will pass all my life wanting to go back in time to get it, to have that little hope what I will get it someday, but don’t even that , cause when a dream is gone, the only thing that left its hopeless , an empty inside of you what I’ll be there forever , what no one could fix it. Something are impossible and you really know that, but you still wanting that, like, can fly, everyone’s knows is impossible, and they still want it, but they accept the reality and go on, there are dreams easier than others, some of them is sure you’ll get it with time, with a lot of steps, easy steps, they are that kind of dream without a limit time to get them, but there are some which are all or nothing and is really horrible cause you know what you got to do something now, or you will be saying goodbye to it, but it’s just not time, cause the waiting time may not be long, and that means what it’s not a little step, is a big one, and the possibilities to make it are 40 % to 60% and it’s just so cruel the fact , I may still trying, look other possibilities but it may be impossible or not , but the only thing you know is what if you do everything will get better, but if you don’t, everything will still being the same shit , except for the fact what you will stay hopeless cause you lose something really important, and that something is exactly one of the reasons of why you still being alive, is one of your reason to live, the ones which let you go on a live your life going to the future, you can’t just look for other reason to live, is not that easy, I wish it were but is not, and I fucking hate that, but that’s the cruel reality, now there’s one less reason to live, at the moment I just want to sleep and forget about it all, that’s some kind of death, I had to have others reasons to live, cause the other reason will kill me, but that the only one that left , and right now it the only thing I can do, my time of life may be shorter or bigger, get this dream means death, no because the dream is die it’s because that is the consequences of get it. What can I say , two complete different dreams, one which open a world of possibilities , good ones, a better future of happiness, o other which open the death door. They don’t know that, but I’ve always been the kind of girl who has no grey, 2 really important dreams, one life of happiness, or one of a dead with found feelings, I had the power to choose but they took it away from me, as they took a sincere which , a hope of a better life, now I don’t have that power, so I will follow the other one, until I get it, until I die. I feel a huge feeling inside of me, I what to scream, but I have no voice, I want to do something but my hand are tie, that’s how it feels the impotence

back again

hola, si, estoy de vuelta despues de mucho tiempo,y en este tiempo muchas cosas cambiaron, inclusive yo,empeso un nuevo año de colegio, muchas personas se fueron unas para bien otras para mal, muchas otras cambiaron,algunas relaciones se mantuvieron otras no, se guardaron rencores y agradecimientos hubo reconciliaciones y peleas. Empece el año peleada con una de mis mejores amigas, pero esa pelea fortaleció nuestra amistad, aunque hace poco nos peleamos feo devuelta, no duro mas de un par de dias. Por otra parte antes era como que me llevaba bien con todos pero no me importaba nadie en realidad, la gente se interesaba por mi, pero a mitad de año es como que termine peleada con casi todos, y era como que de alguna forma si decia algo , me criticaban , nisiquiera tenia la opcion de defenderme, llegaba al punto en que no podia estar sola por que me ponia a pensar y no hacia nada mas que deprimirme, pero paso el tiempo , y daba bronca por que en realidad fue todo por que le querian caer bien a una personaa quien de momento yo le caia mal y se dejaron influenciar,persona que despues terminaron odiando, claro no dicen nada, VIVA LA HIPOCRECIA¡ pero bueh las cosas se calmaron,pero no es lo mismo tampoco los veo de la misma forma, se convirtieron en compañeros de momento, pasamos el tiempo juntos, pero confianza hay poca, y solamente nos juntamos por que la pasamos bien juntos.Por otra parte en el colegio no se como pase de año,es decir las veses que estudie para una prueba las cuento con una mano igual mañana tengo que rendir 2 capitulos de matematica asi que deseenme suerte¡

the fear... its not exacly the same

The fear is something relative, normal people are afraid of it, but most of them never realize what is just a simple feeling, people can be afraid but they can deal with it, others no, the fear sometime has no reason , its just a feeling , nothing else , but this feeling can paralyze you. The courage its something relative too, there are people who look like they are not afraid of anything, but does that mean to be brave? Well, I don’t think so, to me someone brave is someone who can deal with the fears , that’s more important cuz that person had the strength to face it , couse that person exceeded the obstacle and they didn’t ran away. But the most important I guess someone without fear is someone who don’t value the importance of some things , the fear is the prove that something or someone is important to you. Anyway there are different kinds of fear, some people is afraid of the dark, but that doesn’t mean what they love the light , cuz people was always afraid about what they don’t know , and that generates an incertitude which get you on the nerves.
El miedo es algo relativo, y en su mayoría la gente tiene miedo al miedo a sus consecuencias, pero en el momento no se dan cuenta que es uno de los mas simples sentimientos que hay. La valentía es algo relativo también, hay gente que va por la vida y parece no tener miedo de nada pero, eso significa ser valiente? En mi opinión creo que no, que la verdadera valentía esta en quien puede afrontar sus miedos, por que el miedo es algo que te paraliza pero sin embargo se puede superar y afrontar lo que viene. Por otra parte el miedo también es algo que te permite darte cuenta de lo que es importante, pero a veces no tiene sentido otras si, eso significa que uno es consiente del valor de las cosas, pero esto no quiere decir que las personas que andan sin miedo por la vida sean inconscientes de el valor, tal vez si, o tal ves no, tal ves es solo alguien que por valorar mucho algo lo perdió, muchas veces la ignorancia puede ser mejor. Pero hay distintos de tipos de miedo, como el miedo a la oscuridad, eso no quiere decir necesariamente que no se quiera perder la luz sino que se tiene miedo a no saber lo que pueda pasar, a lo desconocido, desde tiempos antiguos la gente tuvo miedo a lo desconocido, y es algo normal, por que te genera una incertidumbre, que te impide pensar claramente y uno empieza a imaginar lo peor posible para adelantarse a eso, pero nunca se sabe.